26 Things I Learned in 26 Years

Dear Reader

Taylor Swift

Never take advice from someone who’s falling apart
(You should find another)

Here are 26 things I’ve learned so far. Sometimes quietly, sometimes loudly, sometimes with a big aha-moment, and sometimes with a lump in my throat. Not all of them are universal truths, but all of them are real. And maybe you’ll recognize yourself in one or two of them. And if you can take even a little something from this for your own life, that would make me happiest. 🥰

1. “A friend to all is a friend to none”

Someone who tries to please everyone will end up being a real friend to no one. Friendship means loyalty and setting priorities. But if someone constantly tries not to upset anyone and wants to please everybody because their ego can’t stand not looking good in front of someone, they’ll eventually upset everyone because nobody can truly trust them.

2. Learn to listen to your gut feeling

Maybe this comes naturally to most people, to listen to their intuition, because it can tell you more about a situation than your head can ever put into words. But for me that wasn’t clear for a long time. I overthought everything, got stuck in my head, and wondered why everything seemed so much easier for everyone else. Turns out: if you spend all your time thinking, you don’t leave room for your feelings to just be and guide you. Sports shooting is, in a way, pure gut feeling too. You can never know that you’re in the center of the target. You have to trust your feeling telling you when it’s time to pull the trigger.

4. When hate fades, you still don’t have to like someone

At some point, you’ll let go of the hate you feel for someone who hurt you simply because hate takes up so much emotional energy. You’ll realize you don’t want to waste that energy anymore. And in the end, you’re allowed to just not like that person.

5. The most important person to forgive is yourself

And yes, that’s easier said than done. We all know the “should’ve, could’ve” spiral. Sometimes you have to put yourself back into the situation and say: Okay, these were the facts I had, these were my feelings at the time, and that’s why I acted the way I did. In hindsight, it’s always easier to say you should’ve done it differently. But back then, you didn’t have the knowledge you have now.
What matters is that you’ve learned from it and admitted your mistake. Many people never even get that far.

6. Just because you understand why someone did something doesn’t mean it was okay

Would you have acted the same way in their place? No? Then you already know what you need to know. Having empathy for others is wonderful, but don’t put your own feelings aside just because you can understand their situation.

7. Gossip is okay, as long as it’s justified

We humans owe it to our ability to talk about others that we can form large societies. Animals can communicate, sure, but if they can’t talk about third parties, their group sizes stay limited. They have to know every single member to judge if they’re trustworthy. Gossip is part of what brought us here as humanity. But please: always with empathy and a moral compass.

8. “Postponed is not canceled”

Some things just need their moment. Just because it’s not happening right now doesn’t mean it never will. Ideas, people, or plans sometimes quietly ripen in the background and suddenly appear at just the right time, when you almost forgot about them.

9. Sometimes the only cure is: “Go outside and touch some grass”

Seriously, sometimes your head just needs fresh air, a bit of movement, solid ground under your feet, and the reminder that most problems are tiny compared to the scale of our world.

10. Your body can do so much more than just be pretty

It carries you through training, through sickness, through days when you had no strength left and it still keeps going. Beauty is the last thing it cares about. It exists so that you exist. It carries you through life. And that’s pretty damn impressive and deserves appreciation.

11. It’s not weird to do things alone

Nobody actually cares if you go to a café, the movies, or on a trip by yourself. And if someone does feel the need to comment on it, that says more about them having nothing better to do. So don’t let fear hold you back, just do what you feel like doing.

12. If you’re struggling with your body, look around

We’re almost always our own harshest critics. The “flaws” we see in ourselves, we would never judge negatively in someone else with a very similar body. That shows how much stricter our gaze is on ourselves than it needs to be and that sometimes all it takes is a small shift in perspective to be kinder.

13. On competition day, it’s all about what you’ve done beforehand

And you have to trust in that. This thought won’t magically take away all your nerves, but it should give you a little more security. And if it’s not enough: back to training. Keep working. Come back stronger.

14. It’s okay to ask for help

I used to find it sooo hard to ask anyone for help because I was stuck in my hyper-independence loop, thinking I had to do everything myself. Over time, in small steps, I learned to ask others for favors and support, and that broke my old patterns. Helping and being helped is amazing, strengthens bonds, and creates a sense of community and that’s just wholesome 🥰

15. You’re not separate from your body

Your mind doesn’t work independently of the rest of you. Your mood, irritability, sadness all of that can be tied to your body. If you want to understand yourself, you also have to understand your body: How do you react when you’re low on sugar, on your period, feeling confined? And how do you handle those situations most productively, so you don’t spiral down?

16. “I don’t know right now” is better than making something up

It shows so much more strength to admit uncertainty than to pretend you’ve got it all together. Honesty builds trust in yourself and in others. Being honest is braver than desperately trying to seem smart.

17. Showing feelings doesn’t make you weak

On the contrary: Talking about your feelings means taking responsibility. And yes, it can be uncomfortable. But it’s much worse to pretend everything’s fine when everyone can tell you’re just putting on an act because your ego can’t handle being real.

19. An apology is only as valuable as the empathy behind it

A few months ago, I asked myself: “Why doesn’t it feel okay between me and this person, even though they apologized and I accepted it?” Then I realized: An apology is only worth as much as the understanding and empathy behind it. Some wounds remain, even after an apology. And some heal over time.

20. Not every hobby has to become a business

It’s okay to do something just for fun. Not everything has to be productive, growth-oriented, or monetizable. Sometimes we’re too stuck in this capitalist mindset that everything we do has to generate something. Or we stumble into it when we just want to look up a tutorial for our hobby and end up with a creator who fully monetized and exploited it. But that doesn’t have to be your path. You’re allowed to play guitar, knit, bake, or do whatever else simply for fun not to be perfect or to make money from it.

21. “I’m not like other girls” is bullshit

At some point, it was a thing for girls and women to feel like they had to distance themselves from other women. Or for men to give compliments like, “You’re not like other girls.” Just… ewww. Other women are wonderful, ambitious, multifaceted, empathetic, and so much more. Why give up that connection to an entire group of people just to position yourself as “better”? “Look at me, I’m so much cooler because I’m not like them.” Ewww, just stop.

22. When your body can’t anymore, it really can’t

Period. End of story. I had to learn this the hard way a few times before I really accepted it. That toxic, “David Goggins”-style ignoring of your body’s signals that it’s done will eventually backfire, badly.

I remember about two years ago, I was already having knee issues (partly due to my hypermobility) and small-bore kneeling wasn’t my strength at all. It felt like a grind. I knew it made the pain worse, but I wanted to be “tough” and push through. After a bad kneeling performance at the Tyrolean Championships, I even drove straight to my home range and shot at least 100 more kneeling shots. Sounds like grit, but honestly, it was just dumb. By the end of the season, my knees were so inflamed and stiff I could barely walk normally. Every time I lay on my back, I had to put something under my knees to keep the pain bearable. It took about a month to recover.

So if you take one thing from this: Please, listen to your body. Yes, you have to push your limits to improve. But there is a limit.

24. Don’t compare yourself to people with different priorities

On social media, comparing yourself to people in other fields is almost inevitable whether in sports, creative hobbies, or something else. But it’s easy to forget that everyone sets their priorities differently. That fitness influencer might put all their energy into strength training. If you’re splitting your time between endurance, hobbies, and other interests, a direct comparison isn’t fair because your focuses are simply different.

25. Make it as easy as possible if you actually want to do it

Willpower is finite. Systems are sustainable. If you build routines that require little resistance, you’ll stick with them long-term.

I’ve bought so many beautiful notebooks in my life, hoping I’d write in them consistently, and most of them are still at home or in my backpack, maybe with three pages filled, collecting dust.
What actually works is the plain Notes app on my phone. If something comes to mind, I jot it down quickly. The phone’s always there, no pen needed. Some notes are organized in folders, others are just floating around but if I ever need them, I’ll find them with a keyword search anyway.

So: It doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to happen. What’s easy gets done more often.

26. Don’t take advice from people who have no idea what you’re actually doing

Especially in sports, it’s easy for unempathetic spectators to judge performance based on a single number and say, “You just need to do more.” More, more, more. But none of them know how much you’re actually training. Without that info, it’s always easy to yell “MORE!”

If you trained 24/7, would you improve? Of course not. So there has to be a point where training shifts from productive to unproductive — or even harmful. Finding that line is what elite sport is all about: squeezing out as much as possible (emphasis on possible).

Closing words

If there’s one more thing I want to leave you with, it’s this: Even confident people are sometimes insecure and full of doubt. I’d say I usually come across as pretty confident but I still battle thoughts like: “Was that too much?” “I’m too quiet / too weird / too different.” “I’m not pretty / thin / good enough.” “Everyone hates me.”

The difference, maybe, is that I’ve learned how to deal with those doubts and don’t get lost in them anymore.